Marriage 101

So we were chatting, as you do, about the weekend and such like banalities when a friend (maybe an acquaintance is a better word) asked me about why I had described the weekend just past as a “bonding” weekend. After all, she said, after twenty years with the same man how much more bonding do you need to do? 

Without further ado, I donned my “advice” hat and attempted to justify (why we do that I don’t know, I should just have told her to go outside and play but anyway). DH and I have been together two decades (ouch 😉 ) and are both extremely busy people. I suppose you could say work orientated which is fine (it works for us anyway), he has a big family, I have a teeny but tight clan on my side. Our jobs both involve dealing with people and their nonsense and our weekends usually involve “people” as well. I can’t begin to explain how beneficial a bonding weekend is for us as a couple. It involves no cellphones (unless a parental emergency), talking, catching up, lots of eating together (a rarity in my house), watching movies together or going to shows etc together. A braai for two on the patio with candles and champagne and great food has become an integral part of the ritual.

We have more respect for each other, more empathy for each other and fight a lot less (I reckon anybody who says they don’t disagree with their spouse occasionally is talking horse twaddle) and that in a nutshell is why such a long married couple still does bonding.

4 thoughts on “Marriage 101

  1. Good for you. We didn’t do it and …

    “If one day you realize I haven’t talked to you in a while, it’s not that I don’t care, it’s because you pushed me away and left me there.”

  2. What a lovely post. I know this reply is two months late, but I only found your blog today. I’m freshly married, (fresh enough that I get tingles when I say “married”) and see the value of those bonding weekends. We both tend to get “peopled out” and crave a quiet weekend with just each other. I think it’s so important. So glad it’s worked for you for 22 years!

    • Thank you so much for your kind words and congrats on the recent nuptials. Don’t let anybody tell you marriage is easy, it isn’t – lots of hard work from both of you but so worth it in the end 🙂 Thanks for the visit.

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